Goodbye

as my world closes in I walk in circles afraid and shamed a sickness of self destruction Mentally disconnected constantly rejected. I can't stop myself from hating myself All I can think is what have I done to deserve this? To put every moment of my life for all to see and hear. No peace of mind each time I stumble the judgement from all around makes me fall further and further down. my poor kids, they sure don't deserve this. Ashamed that the choices I've made reflect upon them Embarrassed of who they have for a mother I can never forgive myself. No one will let me get better and I can't do this forever Today I realize I'll never succeed so since I'm already dead inside what's the point to stay alive tell my boys I loved them so much and I'm sorry but this is the last thing I know I'm doing for them than to them. it's for the best, no tears and no more resets. If this finds it's way to them they finally know it's the only way I could get this nightmare to end