Genuine Hate

I breathe telling myself it's alright, I breathe telling myself baby it's just fine is it? how afraid I am for someone to even touch me because he didn't like that I wasn't on my knee he didn't like that I said "No, No sex and no head" he didn't care about the emotional part of me that craved someone to care hell I showed someone pictures of me as a desperate way to finally get somewhere now I'm scared of the fact that I have a girlfriend now and one day we'll have to see each other's bodies that if I show her mine will she love it just fine hip dips, stretch marks, the scars, the hyperpigmentation, the fat in some areas, the hair and more or will it be a bore I pray I get over it for sure but Zion to this day I hope you know I hate you deep within my core.