Gazing into imperfection

I opened my eyes, looking deeply at myself in the mirror, wondering what's underneath this flesh and bone... a soul? A heart? A child? An misunderstood machine that never got to feel what truly means to be alive and tries to survive each day, but surviving is not living, and surviving is tiring... so I just started existing A soft melody hummed inside my mind as I blinked twice, my attention getting distracted by the sun that began to dawn over the world, a single star onto our sky. I felt tired, I slept for 8 hour straight, onto a comfortable bed and the right temperature, not too hot, not too cold. Yet, I still feel like my entire body just went through a marathon... why? Why do I feel this way? It feels like it's worse than surviving... it feels not even on the slightest right, I feel sick, tired, empty. Like there's a hole inside my stomach thay no matter what... I can't fill it up. Is this what is to be a human... to be bone and flesh... to feel touch... to breath... to... everything... I don't wanna be a human honesty. I want to be a corpse.