funny thought

I want you, I have never felt more unwanted. I love you, yet it feels like your indifference battles that. I'm committed, yet I feel your loss. Im vulnerable with you, yet I'm left feeling the pricks of the thorned walls surrounding you. I'm open to you, your book is a forbidden one, one filled with riddles I can't seem to translate. I listen to you, even when I know you just whisper empty promises. I trust you, even when your actions leave nothing but doubt. It's a sense, I can never comprehend why does loving you, sometimes feel like hating myself?