Fucked up

Why am I a dumb girl? Why am I a ditz, too? Why am I an idot? Why am I stupid? I fucked up lives and it seems to not stop. I wish I wasn't like this, please. God hear me. I need you to help fix me or something. I thought I had smarten up a fly right. But that isn't true because of this one stupid thing I did. I am ruining the lives of others. Because of this one stupid thing, I am ruining those I love lives to. Because of this one stupid thing, I have lost my pet cat, you can say. For I can't see the one being I love because I must get better. Because of my stupid move, I can't see my fur baby. He deserves someone better. They all do, but I don't want to say goodbye to him. Cause even though I fucked up I still adore him. I know im talking to you, Lord, so I'm sorry for the bad words. The thing is, it's all true. I'm nothing but a screw up. And they deserve someone better but there my family. I dont want to say goodbye to my family. She's my caregiver, so I don't want to let her go. She has helped me despite I've fucked things up for her. I only fuck things up it seems I am a stupid,dumb,dizzy,idot. Cause of a step I shouldn't have made. That made me unable to move without help. Just un able and I fucked up.