Fine

How do I stop the sadness I feel? How do I stop the tears that ruin my mascara? How do I stop my broken heart from hurting? How do I make people listen? How do I make myself happy again? How do I eat? How do I cope with depression? How can I feel worthy? Why isn't anything working? Do I have to take pills to stop these feelings? How do i convince myself Im alright? How do I die painlessly? Why talk to a therapist when they know nothing I feel? Things I ask Google because I can find answers myself. Things I ask Google because nobody will listen. Call me selfish. Fine. Call me a cry baby. Fine. You're just a teenager. Fine. I will be perfect. Yes? No! No matter what I do, it's never enough! YOU DONT WANT ME?! FINE! I DONT WANT ME EITHER BUT HERE I AM! I HAVE TO LIVE WITH MY PATHETIC SELF! YOU THINK I DONT KNOW ALREADY, THE INSULTS YOU THROW AT ME?! Of course not. You've never opened your eyes to check. Fine then. I'll pretend everything is fine because THATS what everyone wants. Lies, even outside of social media. Funny? Right. But Im fine. I'm dying on the inside. But let's not ruin your perfect image. After all, that's all we have. We have nothing without our lies. But We are all fine? I am fine? Fine.