Feelings

Sitting here,just thinking about life. Grateful for the little and big happenings, blessed for the people I have in my life, sometimes it gets overwhelming,gets hard, sometimes it's easy, sometimes I just don't want to think about it at all, I treat myself unfairly,I bash myself too much, I adore myself sometimes, I feel like I'm not enough, I feel as if there's something lacking, I feel I have it all, sometimes I just don't want to do life, is this the normal feeling an adult should feel? I'm not even sure what to feel many times. these feelings are my day to day feelings. It happens,many times I no longer even know what to feel,I guess it's just the ups and downs of life