Dear Xxx

Cut my hair heldy tongue Written on my arm is a reminder "Physical pain hurts less" love's a dagger Again I wake up from another nightmare Again I think of her Again I dance with uncertainty Again everything is in fucking disarray I lie to everyone myself others "I'm fine" "Of course I don't hate myself" "I'm ok" "I'm Happy" No I'm not ok I hate myself the most And I've forgotten Happiness Back at Mom's Ex boyfriend's house Beer stood everywhere taunting me with promises of painless euphoria numbless bliss instead Took painkillers 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 ... 27 How is this fair Xxx it's too much to bear