Dear mama

Dear mama please pray for me,I need salvation I need grace but I mostly need hope  I need love which is something life has always taken away from me  Am sorry I turned out a mess mama Life hasn't given me sprinkles yet But it has given  coal as a gift  I wish I could hear  the lullabies you sang to me  Am tired of hearing the shackled voices running in my head  'I now see the monsters from the bedtime stories but their forms are like mine ,why is that mama? Am sorry I can't be the perfect daughter mama I can't even do anything for you mama, am living in a world where lying has become a new trend Looking pretty has become an obsession I am what society calls a disappointment, because I don't follow it's rules of perfection  I am sorry I've become a hurdle to the air surrounding me ,I've become one of life's  obstacles... I remember I never liked pills mama cause I always found them hard to swallow but now I swallow them without water   How does one live without a soul.... because I think I've lost mine mama