Control

The need for self control. Time doesn't stop. Always being on the roll. Don't even have enough time to drop. It's really taking its toll. Buried beneath the ones at the top. It feels like I sold my soul. But don't tell that to no cop. I could never be truly satisfied. I didn't care for anything that I could find. I'd pick it up for five minutes, then act as if I had tried. There wasn't anything to detach my mind. I was left pretty petrified. My life had sunk into such a grind. Stripped of the ecstasy. Everything was taken effortlessly. Stuck crying out desperately. Wandered off towards the next distraction thinking, I won't let it get the best of me. Void of methods to alleviate it. Intently on my case about it. Sick and tired, to the point I hate it. Repercussions every time I act upon it. Drowning here in a sea of it. I don't know what to do with it. Left or right, I'm left endorsing it. My body tries to counter it. If only I could quit it. Why haven't I bit it? Fallen to the bottom of the ladder. Now the defender against vicarious slander. I needed the energy left to focus on all that really matters. Calling upon everything I could gather. I think this is something that I'd rather. I cannot let my realit