Confusion

I have no fucking idea what's going on. One day you bring me up from the hell, and the following day you push me back there. An hour passes and from the tears rolling down my face you make me smile like I never did before. Other times, I feel like I'm at the front door but you just walk out the backdoor. I'll wait for you outside, but I really don't know why. I'd wait for you forevermore, even though I can't see the reason anymore. Maybe you're not the one I was supposed to fall for. I couldn't help but stare, stare at your pretty soul, the soul that was sour, but painfully clear. Looking into those beautiful eyes, seeing my future in the hazel sight. Am I supposed to be alright? I don't understand my own mind. Waking up and the sun hasn't woken up yet, walking my way, trying to pretend. In the quiet rhythm of my sunless days, draped in shadows, life in subtle grays, I'm fighting the demon you raised. Weeks may pass, but hope persists, In the unseen sun, a dream exists. Dreaming bout' your hands on my wrist, acting like our love has never been killed.