Beyond repair

Nails and embedding in my skin. I'm trapped in my mind, complete apathy is all they see of me it's all that they find. thoughts shrouding my life in black, feelings in empathy is what I lack. ideals of sonder fondling my brain, violating my mind, intrusive of thoughts, I don't care to mind. not anymore. For these thoughts aren't mine. it's the poison inside of me, but they drink it so. like a virus it will spread to them. whittling away at their bones. every time I turn around, I see them. every time I close my eyes, I hear them. they whisper in my ears. they Glide their fingers on my flesh. But all I am is a mesh of what i have left. i can feel it close within, their crawling their ways out, For they cover my mouth so I cannot Shout. I close my eyes and count to 10. hoping they disappear when I get to the end. 1. 2. 3. 4 I can't take any of this anymore. 5. 6. 7. 8. please if you're smart enough don't come back for me it's already too late. 9. 10. this is something you can't play pretend. there's a rabid animal inside of me. it wants to hurt everybody that in my life that I may see. But These thoughts comfort cold twitching hands.