belief

2 what should I believe in when i was hurt in myself 48 times harmed by people I trusted when I self harmed for what happened why should I why should take the chance to believe when I get is pain I lost my best friend at the age of 5 I lost my grandpa at the age of 8 and then my uncle at the age if 18 why should I believe 2 what is believing in something you cant see or feel why should I believe in someone who isn't there with you or trust someone who can't help you through how many more times am I going get hurt by the people I love or dont know how many more times am I gonna hurt my self in after math if it be self harm or my anxiety or depression just how many times will someone tell me I have faith when I dont even know what I am putting my faith in to tell me this why should keep going is pain is all I feel