am I ready?

I gave my heart out and you said "it's just me". my heart hurts cause I thought I'd be alone for eternity. why can't I have just only you? why aren't you ready? I know why...I'm scared too. I said I was ready, now I'm not so sure. this was our first issue, now my heart hurts. make me feel better like I did for you all night. now I'm guilt tripping... you don't know yet but I haven't had such a perfect life. why are you scared? I'm confused about your problems. I know that I like you... now I'm embarrassed. so let's just keep doing what we're doing, God I miss you before. I'm ok with how your feeling, now I'm not sure. I want you of course, and your scared ill find another. but I swore up and down, I wouldn't, ever. now your 2nd guessing, self doubts making me take 12 steps back. is it wrong that I never wanted a relationship? gd it, I wanted you! no one's ever suited me like you, i can't pour my heart out again. if you were waiting on me cause I was waiting on you, I did it, didn't I? now I'm not sure what to do. I want to like you, how could you fail me? your voices, really scare me. I'm doing this the healthiest way but I don't know what I'm doing, I'm just doing it my way. my heart feels a little lost.