Always Been A Target

I've always been a target since I was a child. When I defend myself I get accused of being defiled. No matter what I do, I'm always the odd one out. People say they love and care about me but I have my doubts. I've always been a target and it hurts to say. Don't let my smile fool you. I am not okay! The black sheep, the scapegoat. What more can I be? I'm drowning, I'm sinking! Can't anyone see? I've always been a target. I grew up in a house filled with drama. Now that I finally see the dysfunctions, I get ridiculed for calling out the trauma. Anxiety, depression, low self-esteem and trauma are all my symptoms. I've said some things out of anger so no I am not playing victim. I've always been a target, who grew up shy and quiet. I'm just a misunderstood woman surrounded by fake people and giants.