A Jumbled Me

I feel neither sad nor happy I don't feel happy, but I don't feel sad I don't feel beautiful, but I don't feel ugly I don't feel loved, but I don't feel lonely I'm not in pain, but I'm not well I'd like to be here, but also far away I'd like to cry, but I'd also like to laugh I'd like to jump around in puddles, but feel happy like an inner child I'm a jumbled mix of feelings and an ocean of tangled thoughts!