A buried heart

I stare at the ceiling as the thoughts of you echo my brain The feeling that I lost you is like being betrayed I want to scream but stay silent I want to cry but show no emotion I want you but lost you I loved you and you loved her I swear that feeling is the worst I smile everyday to make sure you don't see my pain Staying friends is okay,But when you kiss her is when I break. I want to leave just so I can't see the scene I want to be happy but with you around,my request will never be complete, The love I hold for you Is buried deep in my heart and it wants to leave I stay by your side as she leaves,But I don't think I'm Happy. You call me everyday and cry your life away,While I sit there in shame. You never cried for me so why cry for her? You loved her so why not love me? you want to be alone,Does that mean my heart doesn't have to be buried? Your pain makes my heart hurt more but I think to myself this is how I felt when you did it to me.