1000 cuts

when I was little me and my friends would sit in a circle this or that 1000 paper cuts or one a big cut dishing out answers deliberating pain I sat there in my silence y'know they say death by a 1000 paper cuts hurts more but they wouldn't know the pain, of the giant gnash scratching down my chest from shattered heart stretching, creeping, screaming, down to the twisting knot in my stomach my anxiety is so pigmented my mask thick thick and sharp as the blade the blade that despite the gnash that is consuming my heart and soul my body ,my god damn mind littering skin with those thousand paper cuts and lord knows they hurt like hell but when my broken soul pours out my very chest when my body is more flesh than the layers of false skin false skin that covers my sorrows I would take those thousand paper cuts any day But I look back to my friends my smiles plastering my poorly bandaged wounds I say : "one big cut it'll heal faster than way"